the teeth are falling!

If you ever want to see Emma at her most dramatic completely irrational crazy, I can tell you exactly how-- splinter removal. Does the painful splinter bother her? Not really. In fact she tries to hide them from me so I can't remove them. She is pretty clumsy, so she gets her fair share of injuries and is pretty tough. She usually doesn't dwell over a scraped knee. But for some reason the act of removing a splinter stirs up a kind of crazy that will last for hours. I really am not joking.

I can't talk her down from it either. She is usually very easy to reason with, but not when removing a splinter (or for at least an hour afterwards. while the trauma is still fresh). Luckily, we have only a handful (or two. she seems very splinter prone.) incidences a year.

Emma has a loose tooth. And after our discussion today, through uncontrollable sobbing, makes me believe there may be a second thing that sends her happy magical world crumbling around her.

Oh crap. The hysterics.

It reminds me of Henny Penny. "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!"

mays end

"The universe is full of magical things, patiently waiting for our wits to sharpen."

fairy house cake

Emma has been extremely picky the last few months. She has her phases where she is more willing to try new things, but right now, not so much. If she hasn't eaten that exact thing before and remembered it and remembered liking it, no dice. I can sympathize with her to an extent, but then other times it is so crazy frustrating.

She has a couple different positive reinforcement deals. The smiley face chart, the pine cone jar and now the "I tried new food" sticker chart. The smiley faces are the hardest to earn. She has to be good all day-- a good helper, a good listener, with a good attitude, and no whining-- then she gets $.50. The pine cone jar is for good deeds-- randomly holding the door for someone or offering to throw away a dirty diaper or just doing something thoughtful and kind-- once the jar is full she gets to have a tea party or a special treat. I love both, as does she. She still gets so excited to earn smiley faces and pine cones.

The sticker chart is pretty self explanatory. We set the first goal pretty low. She only had to try 8 new foods (or old foods that she no longer remembers eating or won't eat) and I said I would make her a fancy cake. She did it! Today the girl asked to try a red pepper! Now, that is awesome! Her pine cone jar and sticker chart both topped out together. She got to have a tea party with a fairy house cake!

Yay Emma!

**(You can see the table Emma and I painted, and made a collage of flowers and fairies, last weekend a bit but I will post more about that later.)

Also, looking at all the pictures I just took of Milo (see last post), it made me want to look at toddler Emma pictures. I have made photo albums on Shutterfly (which I will totally order one day). I went and snagged a few photos of her from an album. Here is Emma 13-14 months old.

And this one at almost two because it made me want to snuggle her up!

 Wasn't she just a kitty for Halloween like a second ago?

bugs

Milo has been up to all sorts of things. He started May with four teeth. He fully has five now and three more that have just poked through. He loves water-- puddles, baths, the dog's water bowl, any glass he can reach! He has become really friendly this month, offering hugs to many (although usually brief). Randy calls him a social butterfly, as he flits from one to another.

He babbles all the time. Sometimes it sounds so close to a word-- like moon, there, Emma, yeah, Kyle, bananas (that one is fun!). It's mostly just babbling still, with some "dadda" and "momma". He still points where he wants to go or if he wants you tell him a word.

He is obsessed with airplanes and gets really bummed if he hears one but can't find it. The thing where I thought he would wean easily was not reality. He will drink 2-4 ounces of whole milk a day, but still wants to nurse quite often. I am working on not nursing between wake-up and nap time (7:30 - 12:00), but some days that just doesn't go well. I am hoping to only nurse for nap and bedtime by summer's end.

He loves books, sand, dirt, pulling leaves, digging, food, balls, playing with Kyle, strolls, fans, yelling, throwing stuff, hitting stuff with his hammer, wheels, cars, Elmo.

He is crazy about his sister. He has been playing with Emma more and more. She just taught him how to spin. He thinks it is so cool. They were spinning together this afternoon, laughing so hard. It was so unbelievably precious and also made me a little sick to watch.

His hair is looking very blond. Strawberry blond even. He is cute and funny. He looks like a combination of Emma and Randy. He's my boy. I cannot imagine life without him.

me. today.

A day still sticky with yesterday's humid air, I awoke already sweaty. The breeze made sure I kept the windows open despite the heat. The cool water of the sprinkler was very well received. The smooth and rhythmic flow. Everything is growing, sometimes it's as if another inch of plant appeared while we slept.

We are a week away from June. How?

I feel like this month has just passed me by. Or maybe it didn't, did it?

The thing about becoming more present and enjoying the moment, well, you tend to not think about lists as much. And so less is done. Or maybe that is just where I am, trying to find a balance. 

Through recent years I have questioned if summer has become my least favorite season. The super humid hot air is not my favorite. Winter has grown on me so dearly since I have had children. It's sharing the magic of snow. Fall is so brilliant and spring is so new. Where does that leave summer?

Milo's first real swim. He is such the water baby, this will be a lot of fun. I cannot even begin to explain my excitement. Plus Emma only had one trip to the pool last year because Milo was so very small and too young for sunscreen. There are three things Emma routinely asks about throughout the year, (when will it snow? when can we swim? when will it be my birthday?) so she will be so excited too! She could use a second year of swimming lessons as well.

June will be grand. June means vacation, arts fest, long walks, garden food, farmers market, grilling, and swimming.

Vacation! Besides the obvious love of seeing loved ones-- there is the beach, the mountains. Ah. I crave to lay on a beach, my toes in the sand, listening to waves. To watch my children experience the ocean (Emma a long awaited return to the sea. Milo's first). To gaze at mountains. To leave my current place. To drive, especially in the times where everyone is sleeping and I can enjoy the quiet peace-- and love being surrounded so closely by them. Or the times when everyone sings. Or when Emma makes Milo laugh so hard, that she laughs even harder and it's just a car of contagious happy laughter. After 10 days gone, I know I will be happy to return. I do love our home, our life, but this lady is in dire need of an away.

I wish I could hit a refresh button on myself. Perhaps vacation could help.

My hope is that one day I will be in a place where I love all that I am more than dream of what I could be. But this is who I am today. Trying...

being happy.

a few completely trivial or extremely awesome reasons i smile--


you already know, right?

specifically, watching them play together. they have a relationship. it is so cool. two people i love with my whole being, loving each other completely. what is better than that?

this guy.

fridolf. every time i pass by my strawberries, he catches my eye. also, this confession-- that a small garden gnome brings me joy-- makes me realize certain things about me... happily.

my strawberries. i am eating strawberries that grow right outside our back door on the daily.

tea. a cup of tea. iced tea. just tea.

 i felt yucky yesterday. i let my surroundings control my day. and my aura had to have been completed muddled with toxic and debilitating thoughts. then i blogged. and then i read a couple blog posts and they (the mommas) must have been feeling the same way too. because being a mom/teacher/grown-up is huge and sometimes we need to remember that we all have days where we could have, should have, wish we would have too. but we get to have tomorrow. and that is amazing.

so i took a deep breath. i made myself smile. i watched my beautiful children sleep. and thought, tomorrow will be better.

when a day comes where i feel like, what am i doing?

i will just be. be present. be still.

i will make a cup of tea, watch my children play, eat a strawberry with frid. and soak in the awesomeness of being alive and the huge (and small) blessings that surround me.

and i will find my smile.